Talane’s Coaching Tip for the Week, December 8, 2009
Clear the Clutter
Many thanks to all of you who so kindly completed the Life Coaching Survey! It has been very helpful and I was amazed to discover that many of you have been following my tips for years! I'm deeply flattered and will no longer use my “Classic Tips” to tide over my summer holidays.
Then I had a big laugh when I discovered that clearing clutter was one of the most popular areas of interest–"like" truly does "attract like". I'm a died-in-the-wool packrat and tend to keep things rather than toss them with the result that I must constantly edit my own life. In fact, before I could write this tip with any sort of integrity, I spent a good hour tidying up my office! And that, in fact, is a useful tip. People who have tidy spaces do spend time tidying them. I always seem to find something more exciting or interesting to do!
If I could shed any light on the subject it would be this: our brains really are hard-wired to be one way or the other–either a packrat with the natural tendency to save stuff or a minimalist with the natural tendency to discard stuff. (We can even test for this on a computerized assessment!) If you are struggling with clutter it is because you are wired that way. It is unlikely that you'll every find it easy to get rid of stuff. Consequently, the fastest and easiest way to get rid of the clutter is to find someone who is naturally wired to discard stuff to come over to your home and/or office and help you. Your natural tendency will be to shift things around, not toss. Ask a tidy/organized friend to come over and help you eliminate the excess. Most people who are tidy love to clear out messes and can do it in a fraction of the time that you can. So why not let them have a go? If you don't have any friends or neighbors of this stripe, then you can hire a professional organizer. Or even hire a neighborhood kid to come over and help you out. The worst strategy is to do it alone as you are likely to get bogged down quickly.
That being said, if you want to give it a go yourself, start with one small pocket of clutter. Decide to clear out one dresser drawer or the kitchen junk drawer. Don't go crazy and tear through the whole house or you may end up completely overwhelmed. This week just pick one small area to declutter and enjoy the process!
Warmest,
Talane
P.S. Clearing clutter is a great way to make room for the new and what a great time to do this at year end! Stay tuned for more tips next week!
Copyright © 2009 by Talane LLC. All rights reserved.
Thursday 10 December 2009
Top Ten for a Terrific Holiday Season
Top Ten for a Terrific Holiday Season
December 2009
1. Use the Joy Filter for decision-making.
If someone invites you to something ask yourself, "Will this add joy to my life?" If not, decline. You don’t have to go to every single holiday party you are invited to. Stop sending holiday cards unless you love to do it. It is a pleasure to receive a personal card, but why bother sending a rubber-stamped, printed signature card? Just pick ten people who are special to you and send them a hand-written card. Do only what you find joyful and you are guaranteed a terrific holiday season!
2. Forgive and make amends.
If someone has done something that hurt you, now is the time to call and forgive them. If you have done anything hurtful or damaging to another, make amends even if it wasn’t intentional. Call or write the people you may have offended, apologize and ask them how you can make it up to them. If you wore your friend’s favorite sweater and then spilled catsup on it, it isn’t enough to say "I’m terribly sorry." Buy a new sweater and apologize! You will feel much happier immediately!
3. Get the whole family involved.
Have your kids address the Christmas or Chanukah cards. Have everyone coming to dinner bring a dish. Let the kids make the ornaments and bake the cookies. The holiday preparations can be a burden if you are doing everything by yourself, but lots of fun when everyone pitches in.
4. Take time for yourself every day.
Many people get depressed during the holidays. This year just make sure that every single day you have something to look forward to. It doesn’t have to be something big and expensive. It can be a hot bath, a new magazine or a phone call to a friend. Most people get so busy in the holidays that they forget to enjoy themselves. If you always go to the gym and work out, don’t quit just because it is the holidays.
5. Keep your perspective.
Go with flow. Everything isn’t going to go according to plan so don’t get your hair in a net if cousin Jean doesn’t like her gift or Uncle Carl didn’t remember to send you a Christmas card. Remember the bottom line is to have fun. If the turkey is burnt to a crisp, order a pizza. Forget having a Martha Stewart Christmas. She puts each strand of tinsel on one at a time. It is okay if you just toss it on in globs.
6. Hire it out.
This is usually the busiest time of the year and most people find themselves doing more entertaining than any other time. Why not hire a housekeeper every week during the month of December so that you will feel free to relax and enjoy your friends and family instead of worrying whether the dust bunnies are escaping. If you don’t like wrapping presents have somebody else do it. Hate to cook? Order a ham or turkey cooked by your favorite grocery or restaurant.
7. Simplify your gift giving.
Use a gift registry service (available at Sears) so that your friends and family don’t waste any more time or money buying things you don’t really want or need. As my grandma says, " I’m all for people telling me what they want so it is easy." Or pick out a great gift for all the men and another for all the women and give everyone the same thing this year.
8. Examine your holiday traditions.
Ask everyone in your family what are the three most important things that really make the holiday special. Then focus on those things. You may discover that nobody really wants all those holiday cookies, but really love the tree decorating party. Do what makes the holiday special and forget the rest of the stuff. One really memorable activity or event is what really makes a holiday. You don’t have to do it all.
9. Be an angel.
Go out of your way once this holiday season to do a good deed for someone else. Bring cookies to the retirement home in your community, slip a dollar into the Salvation Army bucket, bring leftover turkey dinner to the guy who works at the all night gas station. Do some small thing to help another or brighten someone’s day that you wouldn’t normally do.
10. Set up an automatic holiday savings account.
It may be too late for this year, but you can get a jump on next year by setting up an automatic savings plan at your bank. They will debit your account and put a fixed dollar amount in your savings account every month. This way you will have a ready stash of cash for the holidays next year!
To all my readers,
For the first time in twelve years, I've created a Life Coaching Survey. I would be very grateful if you took a few minutes to complete this survey online. I'm very interested in hearing what is important to you so that I can make my tips more relevant and useful to you in the coming year.
Thank you in advance for your help with this!
Warmest,
Talane
P.S. Here is the link for the survey: SURVEY
Talane Miedaner, MCC
Author of the international best seller, Coach Yourself to Success (McGraw-Hill, Jan 2000) and The Secret Laws of Attraction
Get free coaching tips at Lifecoach.com
December 2009
1. Use the Joy Filter for decision-making.
If someone invites you to something ask yourself, "Will this add joy to my life?" If not, decline. You don’t have to go to every single holiday party you are invited to. Stop sending holiday cards unless you love to do it. It is a pleasure to receive a personal card, but why bother sending a rubber-stamped, printed signature card? Just pick ten people who are special to you and send them a hand-written card. Do only what you find joyful and you are guaranteed a terrific holiday season!
2. Forgive and make amends.
If someone has done something that hurt you, now is the time to call and forgive them. If you have done anything hurtful or damaging to another, make amends even if it wasn’t intentional. Call or write the people you may have offended, apologize and ask them how you can make it up to them. If you wore your friend’s favorite sweater and then spilled catsup on it, it isn’t enough to say "I’m terribly sorry." Buy a new sweater and apologize! You will feel much happier immediately!
3. Get the whole family involved.
Have your kids address the Christmas or Chanukah cards. Have everyone coming to dinner bring a dish. Let the kids make the ornaments and bake the cookies. The holiday preparations can be a burden if you are doing everything by yourself, but lots of fun when everyone pitches in.
4. Take time for yourself every day.
Many people get depressed during the holidays. This year just make sure that every single day you have something to look forward to. It doesn’t have to be something big and expensive. It can be a hot bath, a new magazine or a phone call to a friend. Most people get so busy in the holidays that they forget to enjoy themselves. If you always go to the gym and work out, don’t quit just because it is the holidays.
5. Keep your perspective.
Go with flow. Everything isn’t going to go according to plan so don’t get your hair in a net if cousin Jean doesn’t like her gift or Uncle Carl didn’t remember to send you a Christmas card. Remember the bottom line is to have fun. If the turkey is burnt to a crisp, order a pizza. Forget having a Martha Stewart Christmas. She puts each strand of tinsel on one at a time. It is okay if you just toss it on in globs.
6. Hire it out.
This is usually the busiest time of the year and most people find themselves doing more entertaining than any other time. Why not hire a housekeeper every week during the month of December so that you will feel free to relax and enjoy your friends and family instead of worrying whether the dust bunnies are escaping. If you don’t like wrapping presents have somebody else do it. Hate to cook? Order a ham or turkey cooked by your favorite grocery or restaurant.
7. Simplify your gift giving.
Use a gift registry service (available at Sears) so that your friends and family don’t waste any more time or money buying things you don’t really want or need. As my grandma says, " I’m all for people telling me what they want so it is easy." Or pick out a great gift for all the men and another for all the women and give everyone the same thing this year.
8. Examine your holiday traditions.
Ask everyone in your family what are the three most important things that really make the holiday special. Then focus on those things. You may discover that nobody really wants all those holiday cookies, but really love the tree decorating party. Do what makes the holiday special and forget the rest of the stuff. One really memorable activity or event is what really makes a holiday. You don’t have to do it all.
9. Be an angel.
Go out of your way once this holiday season to do a good deed for someone else. Bring cookies to the retirement home in your community, slip a dollar into the Salvation Army bucket, bring leftover turkey dinner to the guy who works at the all night gas station. Do some small thing to help another or brighten someone’s day that you wouldn’t normally do.
10. Set up an automatic holiday savings account.
It may be too late for this year, but you can get a jump on next year by setting up an automatic savings plan at your bank. They will debit your account and put a fixed dollar amount in your savings account every month. This way you will have a ready stash of cash for the holidays next year!
To all my readers,
For the first time in twelve years, I've created a Life Coaching Survey. I would be very grateful if you took a few minutes to complete this survey online. I'm very interested in hearing what is important to you so that I can make my tips more relevant and useful to you in the coming year.
Thank you in advance for your help with this!
Warmest,
Talane
P.S. Here is the link for the survey: SURVEY
Talane Miedaner, MCC
Author of the international best seller, Coach Yourself to Success (McGraw-Hill, Jan 2000) and The Secret Laws of Attraction
Get free coaching tips at Lifecoach.com
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